Keeping Your Chelsea Home Safe: A Norfolk Chimney Sweep's Guide

You know, there is a specific kind of damp cold that rolls off the Elizabeth River when November hits Norfolk. It gets right into your bones. I have been feeling it every winter since 2008 when I started climbing roofs around here. Back then Chelsea was a little different than it is now. We didn't have all these fancy breweries and pizza spots popping up on every corner. But the houses? The houses are the same. Old brick. Narrow chimneys. And plenty of soot.

My name is Earl. If you have lived in Chelsea or West Ghent for any amount of time, you might have seen my truck parked crooked on the street. It is the one with the dent in the bumper from a bollard I didn't see back in '14. I have been sweeping chimneys in this area for a long time, and I have seen just about everything you can imagine inside a flue. I’m writing this because I want to keep you safe, and quite frankly, I am tired of seeing good folks ruin their fireplaces with bad habits.

The Granby Street Raccoon Incident

I always tell people that a chimney cap is the cheapest insurance policy you will ever buy. Folks nod at me and say they will get around to it. Then they forget.

Let me tell you about a job I did over on Granby Street a few years back. Nice lady called me in a panic. Said she heard scratching noises that sounded like a demon trying to claw its way into her living room. I get there, and I shine my light up the flue. Two glowing eyes looked right back at me. It wasn't a demon. It was a mother raccoon. And she wasn't alone.

She had a whole litter of kits in there, nesting right on the smoke shelf. It took me the better part of four hours to coax them out safely without getting bit or getting soot all over the lady's white carpet. Raccoons love chimneys. It is like a hollow tree to them, only warmer. If you do not have a stainless steel cap with a mesh screen, you are basically putting out a "Vacancy" sign for every squirrel, bird, and raccoon in Norfolk. Get a cap. It keeps the critters out and keeps the rain from rotting your mortar.

Creosote Is Not Just Dirt

Here is where I have to get serious for a minute. When I come into your house and spread out my drop cloths, I am not just there to dust things off. I am there to get rid of creosote.

When you burn wood, the smoke goes up the stack. But as it gets near the top, the bricks are cold, especially with that river wind hitting them. The smoke condenses and turns into this tar-like gunk called creosote. It sticks to the walls of the liner. It is highly flammable. If you let that build up, all it takes is one hot fire to ignite the chimney itself.

I have seen what a chimney fire does. It sounds like a freight train running through your living room. It can crack your tiles and melt your siding. The National Fire Protection Association, or NFPA 211 as they call the code, has a rule about this. The fire code people say you gotta get it checked every year, and for once I agree with the government. They aren't trying to sell you anything. They just don't want your house to burn down.

Wood Stoves vs. Gas Inserts: Earl’s Take

Now, I know a lot of you are renovating these old Chelsea homes. I see a lot of people ripping out perfectly good fireplaces to put in gas inserts. I get it. You push a button. The fire turns on. You don't have to haul logs. It is easy.

But to me, a gas fire has no soul. It is just a blue flame dancing around some fake ceramic logs that never burn down. There is nothing like the heat from a real wood stove or an open hearth. It is a different kind of warmth. It dries your boots out faster and smells like home.

However, if you are going to burn wood, you have to do it right. Do not go buying that green wood from a guy on the side of the road in a pickup truck. If the wood is wet, it sizzles. That steam cools down your smoke and creates that creosote I was talking about earlier. You want seasoned hardwood. Oak. Hickory. Stuff that has been split and stacked for a good six months at least. If you smack two pieces together and it sounds like a dull thud, it is too wet. If it makes a sharp "clack" sound, it is ready to burn.

Stop Burning Trash

I had a customer off Redgate Avenue who wondered why his chimney was clogged up so bad. Turned out he was burning pizza boxes and wrapping paper every Friday night. Folks, your fireplace is not an incinerator. The chemicals in that paper burn too hot and they leave nasty deposits.

Stick to wood. Maybe a little newspaper to get it started, but that is it. And for the love of everything holy, do not throw your Christmas tree in the fireplace in January. Pine needles are full of sap and burn like gasoline. You will spark a chimney fire before you can blink.

When Should You Call Me?

If you use your fireplace more than a dozen times a year, I need to see you annually. If you only light a fire for Christmas and Valentine's Day, maybe you can push it to every two years, but you should still get it inspected for bird nests.

I am not getting any younger, and my knees pop every time I climb a ladder these days, but I still do the job right. I still use the brushes. I still check the flashing on the roof to make sure you aren't leaking water. I take pride in keeping the fires in Norfolk burning where they belong - inside the box, not in the walls.

Keep your wood dry. Put a cap on your flue. And if you hear scratching in the middle of the night, well, you know who to ring up. I'll bring the heavy gloves.